The Art of RSVP'ing

Recently I read a blog post that was floating around Facebook, " 6 Reasons my Husband and I Probably Won't Attend Your Event...". It is about how one woman feels regarding events and her family life. Although some of her comments may be funny, the jist of the article rubbed me the wrong way. Before I start my response, if you dont know me, I am married with a toddler (14 months).  If you haven't read it, go ahead, otherwise you may not know what I am referencing. 

Just to recap, the  reason for writing the blog was because the author missed two “important events” that she  was "actually invited to, RSVPd for, and expected to attend”. 

Now here is the point of my response… Don’t RVSP “yes” to an event unless you know you are definitely able to attend. The art of RSVP’ing seems to have fallen by the wayside. But if you have ever planned a wedding or a big party, you should know that big events are not cheap. You have to account for food, place settings, materials, equipment and so much more. When you say you are going to an event, and then don't go, you caused the host a great deal of money. It is absolutely inconsiderate to respond  to an event and then not go (unless you have an emergency). 

Ok, now to to touch on the topics that were discussed in the blog listed above... 

• Yes, kids are unpredictable, and often cause glitches in plans, but once again, if you dont have a reliable stack of babysitters lined up, just don't plan to go to the event. At least book a babysitter before you send in your rsvp. You know you have a kid before you RSVP. 

• Yes, Kids are exhausting and will leave you tired, but I can almost guarantee, a night out sans baby is good for the soul. People underestimate the power of a date night. For me, it is just as/if not , more refreshing than sleeping.

• Even if you are married, you do not have to skip an event if your partner is busy. For example, this November, I will be attending a wedding of a close friend and my husband cannot get off work. I love my husband, but just because he cannot go, doesn’t mean i should skip the event.

• The authors 5th point just kills me. She states that she has a “financial budget and priorities"  yet by not showing up to someones event that she rsvped  “yes” for,  she is causing her friend's money. Parties and weddings are not cheap for the person throwing them. Just because they are spending money on an event doesn’t mean the host wants to toss money down the drain. 

• The 6th point really makes me disgust the author. “ We just dont want to go!” Is the worst excuse I have ever heard… Once again, lady, YOU said you were going to the event, and RSVP’ed yes… maybe you should have thought about that before you responded “Yes”.

Just because you have kids doesn’t mean you have to become a recluse who is inconsiderate of others feelings and expenses. Kids are hard, i won’t deny that, but it is people like this who ruin all the fun for parents everywhere. If you are a parent who wants to stay home and sleep, good for you. There is nothing wrong with that. All you non parent friends out there, please don't assume that just because your friends have kids means they can’t go out or come to your party. Thank God for babysitters. Please remember next time your rsvp to someones event, there is really a point to it… save your friends trouble and be straightforward.

The Next Chapter

Today is the end of a chapter. Tomorrow is the beginning of a new one. It is hard to believe I have been a mom for over 11 months now. If you count growing baby B, almost 2 years... Monday morning will be a new step for me as a mother.

The past 9 months have been a huge challenge for me. I have dealt with a lot of emotions resulting from being away from Braeden so much. July 20th I begin my new job... a stay at home, jack of all trades, MOM. I am excited and nervous...

Braeden's first day of daycare at 12 weeks!

Being a woman is a tricky, sticky subject. You have lots of different types of women. You have the career oriented woman who beautifully climbs the ladder to success. You have mothers who do part time work. Last but not least, you have full time stay at home moms. The subject can get alittle sticky, but I am glad to say I tried it all out, and eager to start the job I love.

The very first weekend I met Dan, we sat around talking for hours. We discussed the future, each others passions, and pretty much everything under the sun. At the time, I was on hiatus from college, and he asked me what I "wanted to be" when I "grew" up. I point blank told him I wanted to be a mom. That is a really weird thing to say, but I always knew it in the back of my head. In college, I was the "mom" of the group. It came to me naturally.  When I finally finished up college, and moved up North, I started working in research. There is not a whole lot you can do with a bachelors in Biology. I was blessed with a great job at the same hospital as Dan.

 When the day came, and we found out we were expecting, I didn't know what the future held for me. Dan and I decided that it was best for me to continue working a while longer. If you don't know, Residents don't make a lot of money. Actually, they make less than some people with bachelors degrees.  Imagine this scenario... You go to college for 4 years and then medical school for 4 years. During that time, you cannot work. You rack up well over $200,000 in student loans. Then you finally start working and you make barely enough to get by. So needless to say, the second income was  definitely needed to live comfortably.

I pushed through and put in 3 years as a research technician. Although I enjoyed the people I worked with,  I cannot say that I love what I did ( the last year has definitely been better). When the day came that my boss told me he was moving I was kind of relieved. I had never had an "out", and finally, the day came. I was offered a position in the GI clinic, but after talking with Dan, the perfect "pausing" time came into view. I never liked the idea of quitting, but its as if God put everything into place, and the timing could not have been more perfect for this transition. Dan graduated his residency a month before my last day.

I know being a full time mom is a lot of work... probably more work then I am expecting, but I welcome it with open arms. I cannot believe how fast the past 11 months of Braeden's sweet life have gone by. I want to soak in every minute with him. I didn't think it was possible to have so much love in my heart.

So for all of you working momma's who have children. Keep up the good work. You are making a beautiful life for your family. It is incredibly hard to be away from your child, trust me I know.

For all you stay at home momma's. Send on the tips and encouragement. I know it will be a lot of work. I am ready for this next chapter!

Huge shout out to Braeden's sweet teachers over the past 9 months (Dawn, Jamie, Brittany, Carol, Karen, Chelsea, and Jamee) !!!

Learning how to sit up!

Working those leg muscles!

So stylish!

Taking a snooze on the walk!

Santa came to his classroom!

Learning to stand!



Braeden realizes he loves big boy food!



Snuggling on a sick day!

More snoozing!

Learning to hold his own bottle!

He loves to eat!

Art!

Getting ready to start a project!

Where has the time gone?

I know people with kids always give the advice “Cherish this time, it goes by way too fast”… and now, as the mom of an almost 10 month old, I am say “Seriously?!?, where has the time gone?”

The past couple months have flown by. It is crazy to think that I am already planning my itty bitty baby’s 1^st birthday. I feel like I blinked and he grew up. I wanted to do this blog for some time now to update friends and family on how our little Dometita family is doing. I feel as though I haven’t had a spare moment in my day to even sit down and take a breather.

Braeden:

Braeden is growing like a weed. He is one active little guy who is always on the move. He is currently standing on his own and has managed to take 5 steps in a row without falling. He loves eating and will race over to anyone holding food. Daycare calls him the “garbage disposal” because anytime he sees a baby eating, he crawls over and lingers waiting for flying food… haha. Gross, I know. But hey, this kid has put worse things in his mouth. His teething seems to be contributing to his “let me taste this object” phase. God forbid he sneaks into the bathroom and sees the toilet paper roll…lol. He is advancing quite beautifully and Dan and I are really proud. He does not talk much but really gets going with his babbling noises… He does say “Mama” when he is really upset, and we think he says “up”… but the rest of his words are babbles. We are really working on “Dada” and hopefully he will get that by father’s day ;) His most recent checkup (9 months) he weighed 19.5 lbs and is alittle over 27 inches. We have been struggling with ear infections for the last 4 months and are finally going into see a specialist in the next week.It is hard to believe we are starting to plan his first birthday! I cannot believe how fast time is going by.

Mommy:

For those who don’t know yet, I am resigning from my job at Geisinger to be a stay at home mom. I am wrapping up my projects at work and am starting to train my replacements. July 17^th will be my last day. I have learned a lot in the 3 years working as a research technician. I am very excited for this next chapter of our lives, and although I know being a “SAHM” is a lot of work, I look forward to being able to actually spend time as a family when my husband comes home from work instead of our current situation (scrambling to find something to eat, cleaning, prepping for the next workday). It will be nice to have dinner ready and a decently cleaned house, with nothing else to worry about except spending time together.

Daddy:

Dan will be taking the title of “chief resident” starting July. During the year, he will be splitting his time, half will be working as an attending, and the other half will be administration (for the internal medicine residency program). I know this year will be busy for him, but we are excited that he is finally done with “school”.  Although he has been a doctor for 3 years already, he is finally on his own. In the coming year he will be interviewing for positions, fellowships, or other administrative opportunities… we look forward to the future, wherever that may be. I am so proud of all of his hard work. The grueling hours and minimal pay have really been difficult but I look forward to the future, settling down… and to getting these student loans paid off.